Talk:Rock the Vote

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 Definition This organization was created to empower the American youth population by in the realm of politics by encouraging them to become involved in politics. Incorporating elements of youth culture and an understanding for youth life in America, this interest group informs young people on current political issues, helps youths register, and encourages voting among the youth population. [d] [e]
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First (instructor) evaluation comments

Hi Doris,

Here are some some suggestions for further improvements to your encyclopedia entry draft:

  • You might flesh out the intro section a bit more, providing a more comprehensive overview of what the whole entry is about. On that note, you should replace the Microsoft stuff in the infobox with basic info about RTV.
  • The "History" section looks like it's off to a good start, though you might divide it into subsections to make its structure more apparent to readers. You might also include more specific information -- e.g. Which "members of the recording industry" were involved in the founding? What did youth voter turnout stats look like around 1990?
  • The "Current objectives and activities" section is very short.
  • In addition to listing RTV's current officers in the "Organizational structure" section, you might discuss its leadership roles and their responsibilities in more general terms. You might also say a little bit about its membership beyond the leadership level.
  • The "Achievements" section could be more detailed. It might be nice to include a table with youth voting statistics to help demonstrate the extent to which it's gone up since RTV got off the ground.
  • The "Public perceptions and controversies" section raises some interesting points; one thing that might help make them more compelling is to be more specific in naming sources of criticism and opposition. For example, you mention "another opposition group" -- you might as well say which group it was (and provide a source for its allegation).

Shamira Gelbman 12:37, 3 October 2009 (UTC)

Second (peer) evaluation comments

First off I just wanted to say great start on your encyclopedia entry! Theres a lot of information and I thought it was categorized in an easy to follow and interesting format. I think that the entry is very complete and really only needs small changes to make it even better. I would advice to end the entry by moving the current objectives category between Public perception and references. You could transition into the current objectives from the controversies section by flipping the two paragraphs in the controversies section having the accused bias paragraph transition into the current objectives. The issues awareness part of your controversies paragraph could be expanded by several sentences and include an item about the healthcare debate which would be a wonderful transition to your ending. Other than that I Found your encyclopedia complete and easy to follow. While writing my opinion essay I had also checked the wikipedia entry for this interest group and your entry was actually longer and you expanded on certain issues only briefly mentioned on wikipedia so congratulations! -Jake Pirtle